As you can tell from my last post, spelling is not something I'm very good at. We all have little things that we just don't do well. So why is it, in today's world we expect our kids to be perfect? Just like that perfect family photos that come in the mail every Christmas. I confess, every year I line up my kids on the stairs and try for the perfect picture. It never works out the way you think it will. Kind of like raising kids.
Why do we expect such perfection in our children? Perfect students with perfect grades, perfect in whatever sport they play or instrument they lug around. Perfection in the way they look and act, all the time. I don't know about you but I would crumble under all that pressure.
Maybe our parents were right when they said "try your best". I don't remember anyone when I was younger telling me to be perfect. Be good,yes, but not perfect.
I give up.....what I mean is I don't expect perfection from people anymore, least of all my children. I expect them to be good human beings. Helpful, kind, understanding and fair. I think that's hard enough to achieve, don't you???
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Yes, I do ... try your best. That's all I've ever asked of the boys. Fortunately it's worked out very well. I have a different situation, though - that of counterbalancing their dad. Their dad demands perfection. Jalen brought home a great report card - the kid has a 3.96 and is tied for first in his class - but he bombed his Spanish final with a 79. (If you want to call that bombing it). So what does his father do? Circles the 79 in red and puts it on his fridge. What an ass. Jalen sees it for what it is - and I tell him, just do the best job you can; don't stress over an A-! So while his dad expects perfection, I don't .... just be happy, productive, kind people, do your best ... and really, what more can you ask for? As a reasonable parent? Not much. It is really, really frustrating for me sometimes. Needless to say, their dad is pretty much a whammo.
ReplyDeleteI think the next time Dad does something stupid Jalen should write it down, circle it in red and hang it in his room, that way he remembers that Dad isn't perfect either! ( I'd say put it on the fridge, but that might start a fight)
ReplyDeleteI can be hard on the boys about their grades but my reply to the low ones is "now you know what you have to work on". But perfection...forget it. I couldn't do half of what they do in school now!