Friday, July 31, 2009
So what do you want to talk about?
This is suppose to be a blog about peoples problems and adventures having older kids, but I seem to be doing all the talking. If anyone else has a topic or questions that they want to talk about feel free to do so. Though with my kids there is plenty to talk about!!
Thursday, July 30, 2009
What are you going to do??
At some point, before your ready for it, your older teen is going to want to go away with his/her boyfriend/girlfriend. This is a hard one. Some parents have no problem with their over 18(and sometimes younger)child going on a little vacation with their partner. For some of us, it ain't that easy.
So what are you suppose to do? Most kids this age have jobs and cars and lead very busy lives. Some one once said to me that one of the hardest things to deal with as a parent is the knowledge that your children are sexual beings. Oh boy, this is so true!
Even after all the books and talks and hand puppets and screaming,(on their part)they are going to have sex. But in the timeless tradition of parenthood, I don't need to know about it. As in most things that we teach our kids, you can only hope that they listened and go from there.
What I think I'm trying to say is they may be ready for this but you never will be. Yes, you will get use to them going off on little weekend getaways, camping trips and full blown vacations. Of course by then, the next kid will be ready to start the whole thing over again.....
So what are you suppose to do? Most kids this age have jobs and cars and lead very busy lives. Some one once said to me that one of the hardest things to deal with as a parent is the knowledge that your children are sexual beings. Oh boy, this is so true!
Even after all the books and talks and hand puppets and screaming,(on their part)they are going to have sex. But in the timeless tradition of parenthood, I don't need to know about it. As in most things that we teach our kids, you can only hope that they listened and go from there.
What I think I'm trying to say is they may be ready for this but you never will be. Yes, you will get use to them going off on little weekend getaways, camping trips and full blown vacations. Of course by then, the next kid will be ready to start the whole thing over again.....
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Perfection....
As you can tell from my last post, spelling is not something I'm very good at. We all have little things that we just don't do well. So why is it, in today's world we expect our kids to be perfect? Just like that perfect family photos that come in the mail every Christmas. I confess, every year I line up my kids on the stairs and try for the perfect picture. It never works out the way you think it will. Kind of like raising kids.
Why do we expect such perfection in our children? Perfect students with perfect grades, perfect in whatever sport they play or instrument they lug around. Perfection in the way they look and act, all the time. I don't know about you but I would crumble under all that pressure.
Maybe our parents were right when they said "try your best". I don't remember anyone when I was younger telling me to be perfect. Be good,yes, but not perfect.
I give up.....what I mean is I don't expect perfection from people anymore, least of all my children. I expect them to be good human beings. Helpful, kind, understanding and fair. I think that's hard enough to achieve, don't you???
Why do we expect such perfection in our children? Perfect students with perfect grades, perfect in whatever sport they play or instrument they lug around. Perfection in the way they look and act, all the time. I don't know about you but I would crumble under all that pressure.
Maybe our parents were right when they said "try your best". I don't remember anyone when I was younger telling me to be perfect. Be good,yes, but not perfect.
I give up.....what I mean is I don't expect perfection from people anymore, least of all my children. I expect them to be good human beings. Helpful, kind, understanding and fair. I think that's hard enough to achieve, don't you???
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
What gives.....
O.K.... first the facts.....
The reason I wanted to start a blog was to give Mom's a place to share information. Now this is were things get tricky. I'm the mom of 4 boys ages 22,19,17 and 12. Several things have come up in our lives lately that sent me to friends, family and finally, the internet. The friends and family were a help, but the internet let me down. It seems like once your children are potty trained and off to school your done with the hard part. WRONG! That's the easy stuff! If I could go back to those days, I'd be a happy woman!
One thing I want to make clear is that I have good kids. I think all kids are good kids, sometimes they just do dumb things. Mine decided to wait until they were older to do their dumb things. One week last December saw our oldest get arrested for driving while impaired, the next one decided that the very expensive college he was at was not for him and the 17 yr. old declared he wanted nothing to do with High School grad. celebrations, pictures or ceremonies. All while the 12 yr.old decided this was a good time to bug his parents about the types of video games we won't let him play.
After lots of searching I found that there was a whole lot of nothing on the internet dealing with problems parents have while their kids were finding their feet in the real world. I'm hoping this will be that place, a place to share and not judge. Help and laugh together, because one thing is certain raising kids is Gods way of getting back at us for all the things we did wrong at that age!!
The reason I wanted to start a blog was to give Mom's a place to share information. Now this is were things get tricky. I'm the mom of 4 boys ages 22,19,17 and 12. Several things have come up in our lives lately that sent me to friends, family and finally, the internet. The friends and family were a help, but the internet let me down. It seems like once your children are potty trained and off to school your done with the hard part. WRONG! That's the easy stuff! If I could go back to those days, I'd be a happy woman!
One thing I want to make clear is that I have good kids. I think all kids are good kids, sometimes they just do dumb things. Mine decided to wait until they were older to do their dumb things. One week last December saw our oldest get arrested for driving while impaired, the next one decided that the very expensive college he was at was not for him and the 17 yr. old declared he wanted nothing to do with High School grad. celebrations, pictures or ceremonies. All while the 12 yr.old decided this was a good time to bug his parents about the types of video games we won't let him play.
After lots of searching I found that there was a whole lot of nothing on the internet dealing with problems parents have while their kids were finding their feet in the real world. I'm hoping this will be that place, a place to share and not judge. Help and laugh together, because one thing is certain raising kids is Gods way of getting back at us for all the things we did wrong at that age!!
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